


These crossovers are weird: A Mass Effect/Too Many IPs Story

by Buttonfan20



Series: The Bullshit Literary Universe [3]
Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Mass Effect Trilogy, Mortal Kombat (Video Games), Overwatch (Video Game), Star Fox Series
Genre: AU, Did anyone like the first one?, Drama, Friendship, Humor, I suppose, Light-Hearted, LotSB, M/M, Mass Effect 2, Petty Drama, Quarian politics, Relationship Advice, Super Power of teamwork, This Is STUPID, its a sequel, paragade, spoilerz
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2019-06-29 11:07:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15728157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buttonfan20/pseuds/Buttonfan20
Summary: Human colonies are vanishing. An 'elite' task force led by a (recently resurrected) early 20's soldier who beat up a god and their shady benefactors are the only ones standing in the way of anhililation. Chances are the galaxy is doomed. (Multifandom/AU)





	1. Cerberus

**Author's Note:**

> So just a head's up. This a direct follow-up to the last thing I wrote. If you want an up-to-speed you might wanna read that first. Plus there's so many stupid crossovers in this it's like I just threw a dartboard at some franchises and just went from there. So uh... You've been warned I guess?

Fox's day had been... something, alright. Peppy, in his infinite wisdom had kicked Fox off to some low-end high school on earth since Fox had never finished his second-degree education. He did this despite Fox taking care of the Aparoids only a few months ago. On the same day he arrived, he had to end his relationship with Wolf O'Donnell, joined up with a group of other questionably-aged students to kill some asshole in a suit of armour that wouldn't be out of place on a stereotypical metal album cover. Not too long after that, he was approached by some people saying they were working for an organisation called Cerberus, whoever they were. He'd been taken out behind the gym he and his team had recently destroyed. Slightly worried about being attacked, Fox kept his pistol (A gift from Wolf, REMEMBER?) at his side.

"So are you going to fill me in on why you want me, or are you just going to shoot me? Because if that's the case, just go ahead now." said Fox, leaning back against a dumpster.

"Attitude problems. At least that was mentioned in your dossier." said the Australian woman, unsurprised.

"Attitude problems? Did you even read up on me?" responded Fox, rolling his eyes upwards.

"I wasn't the one who wrote up the dossiers, arsehole." snapped the Australian, crossing her arms.

"Miranda, back off. We're trying to get him on our side." said Cassie, the squad's defacto leader. "Yeah, sorry about that. It was either her or Jacob and he's pretty devoted to his workout routine." Miranda grunted at this and turned to monitor the area.

"Um, Cage. There were other people you could've chosen." Said the scarred Turian to her left.

"I'll put it this way: Mordin's spent the last day working on the counter-measure, I don't want to know what Grunt's been doing since he's locked off the cargo bay more often and I'm pretty sure Jack wants to kill all of us. Miranda was the best option."

"Counter-measure? So are you going to tell me what the hell's going on?" asked Fox, his posture becoming more rigid.

"Right, that." started Cassie, clearing her throat dramatically. "Long story short, these... things called Collectors have been abducting human colonies across the galaxy. Some asshole who I'll refer to as Name Redacted is putting together a team to deal with them because nobody else is bothering to. Your name came up on that list. What I'm saying is, we need you."

"Me? Why would you want me over pretty much everyone else in the galaxy?"

"I had a look at your service record, McCloud. Shit's impressive. Led a four man fighter squadron and ended a system-wide war, liberated a planet full of DINOSAURS by yourself, wiped out an alien assault on your system and... This." Cassie looked over to the half-destroyed gym, her speech becoming more slow. "And that last thing, you did most of that ON FOOT, hell yeah you're qualified for this.

Fox took a bit to consider his options. He could turn down their offer, or join their team. But there was one factor he was still curious about.

"How much am I being payed?" Asked Fox, finally getting off the wall.

"Two-hundred thousand Credits. Or we can convert that into whatever currency you want when the job's done." Said Cassie, turning her head to a still disgruntled Miranda.

"Don't exactly have much going on right now, when I think about it. Fine. I'm in."

"Well. That went much better then I was expecting. You're gonna be a huge asset to the team, McCloud." Said Cassie, stretching out her hand for a handshake, which was warmly accepted by the furry trash.

"Yknow, I've got a team. I can try convince some of them to sign on, if that's okay with you guys." Said Fox, stopping the Cerberus group before they walked off.

"Huh... I know we're supposed to only recruit from the dossiers, but if people are willing to join I'm not going to stop them."

"Agreed. Looking through who you've already got we could really use a tech expert of some kind." Said Miranda, rubbing her chin in a stereotypical thinking manner.

"And if someone can get us some better guns, that would be amazing. Using what we find lying around isn't exactly getting us decent stuff." Said the Turian.

"Aw, that hurt my feelings, Garrus. Besides, we got the Vindicators from your place on Omega, so don't complain about that." Replied Cassie, nudging her fist against Garrus' arm playfully.

"Oh, those were from the Blue Suns mercs, didn't want them making the place a mess." Responded Garrus.

"Well, luckily for you, I think I know some people." Said Fox, ushering them towards the car park.

\----

"Seriously, you left without me? What the actual fuck, Rocket?" Groaned Fox, hand resting on the top of his muzzle and covering his eyes.

"Well if you hadn't taken your sweet time hanging out behind that gym while the cops started showing up, maybe we wouldn't have left." Responded Rocket, who was standing on a trash can. "So who're these losers?"

"Well. I can already tell this will be a productive meeting." Said Miranda, shrugging her shoulders.

Fox, after being abandoned by his team heading out to get wasted at a bar, had to walk there. As expected, late night British streets were filled with raucous teens drunk out of their minds or angry football fans throwing punches outside of bars. Possibly both. Fox dragged Rocket and Sombra out of the bar, using 'we need to talk in private' as his reasoning.

"Alright McCloud. Out with it. Why do you want us here. I could be exposing some powerful people right now but I'm here instead." Said Sombra, keeping her hacking hand busy by moving her fingers ever so slightly.

"Human colonies are being attacked by the Collectors. We're putting together a team to deal with the problem and Fox recommended you two. The trash panda for helping us out with our weaponry and you for being the best damn hacker on earth, probably in the galaxy." Said Cassie, speaking for Fox before he got a chance to open his mouth.

"Uh huh. So, how dangerous is this?" Said Rocket, his interest peaked.

"Well given how missions like this usually turn out, probably a one-way trip for some of us." Replied Cassie, her tone now more subdued.

"Oh I am SO in. This is the kind of shit I live for."

"If he's in, I'm in. Besides, it's better then working for Talon... Fuck you Gabe..." Muttered Sombra, giving Rocket a fist bump.

"Holy shit, I thought picking people up today was going to be a pain, but it's actually worked out great." Said Cassie, relieved.

"I'll send you three the co-ordinates to our ship. If you can get there by tomorrow morning, that would be great. Name Redacted would probably want to be informed of this, Commander." Said Miranda, opening up her Omni-Tool and pushing some buttons.

"See you tomorrow, McCloud. We'll get you more up to speed then." Said Cassie, patting Fox on the back as she started to walk away.

"Wait a sec" Said Rocket, causing the Cerberus group to stop and turn around. "How much are we getting paid?"

"Two-hundred grand in Credits or whatever currency you want, same as everyone else." Replied Cassie, looking over her shoulder.

"Two-fifty for both of us, or the deal's off." Said Rocket with a devilish grin.

"We're being extorted for money by a talking raccoon... For fucks sake." Muttered Miranda.

"I'm sure we can cover those." Said Cassie confidently.

Rocket and Sombra looked towards each other, grinning. "We're in."

\--------

Driving through the British countryside was oddly relaxing for Fox. Wolf agreed to lend him his car under the conditions he brought it back once he got home. In the case he didn't, Fox sent the co-ordinates to his one-eyed friend. The skies were dark, but no rain was forecast. It had been like this for a few hours now. but Fox was still worried about the chance of rain. He just knew that he would have to walk outside for a bit and the last thing he wanted to happen was to show up drenched. Convincing Wolf that he was working outside of the system was surprisingly easy. Given Wolf's mercenary background, he probably didn't worry about anything Fox would eventually come up against. Probably lousy mercs. Fox had made sure to pack accordingly, mostly just spare clothes, some armour and Wolf's gift for him. All of it was dumped in a carry-on bag with the usual Starfox insignia plastered on the front. Yeah, Fox wore his own merch.

Honestly, he was just driving for a while. Nothing but farmers for a solid twenty minutes. Can't exactly make that interesting.

Fox eventually arrived at his destination, a surprisingly large hangar. There were a few smaller ships outside, but obviously the one Fox would be boarding required the full thing. Fox couldn't help but get a little excited at the thought of working on a ship that was decently sized. With actual people! Closest thing he ever had was the Great Fox, but he could acknowledge that the ship was far too big for just five people and a robot. Fox could've sworn he never had to use half of the rooms on that thing, anyways. After parking across two spaces like a dick, Fox wandered over to the nearest back door he could find, where he met Rocket and Sombra hanging out, both with their backs to the wall. Sombra was still in her usual getup, which meant she probably had six pairs of the same outfit. Only thing different about her was that the lights on her shaven side of her head were glowing white. Rocket was in the same outfit as yesterday, but just wine red instead of navy. That probably meant he just had palette swaps of the same clothes. Fox assumed that's how they hit it off. Both of them had suitcases to their right, the smaller one probably for the raccoon.

"Well look who decided to show up." muttered Sombra, looking at her fingernails intently.

"Dissapointed?" asked Fox, deciding not to stand next to them, as it would come off as a bit awkward.

"Well everyone else I've worked with has been incompetant, so you're automatically an improvement." replied Sombra, opening up a purple screen, probably her own way of using the internet, Fox certainly didn't put it past her.

"And 90% off all the people I've ever worked with have been douchebags." Said Rocket in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Can't you just find better people to work with, Rocket?" asked Fox, keeping an eye out for anyone who had Cerberus branding, or one of the three the recognized from last night.

"Well I have, and it hasn't worked." groaned back Rocket, almost surprised that Fox asked him that.

"Oh gee, thanks. So Sombra, I suppose you've looked into these guys?"

"That I have. From what I've been able to find out on the car ride here, they're a pro-human group with a presence basically everywhere but here. They're 'humans are the best!' kind of people, so they're automatically assholes. There's also some shady stuff they've done in the past but nothing too surprising if you've spent enough time in my line of work." explained Sombra, scrolling through pages she had saved on... herself.

"Pro-human? Then why are they picking up guys like me? And the turian from last night?" asked Fox, a bit of concern in his voice.

"If they're doing that then obviously these Collectors are serious pains in the ass." responded Sombra, swiping away her screen.

"One thing's for certain. That turian's voice is something else..." said Rocket, almost completely ignoring the conversation.

Fox tried opening the door, but walked into it instead, stunned that it wasn't opened.

"Doors locked." Said Sombra, dryly.

"I can see that" moaned a disgruntled Fox

"Like, his voice is fucken' perfect..." Droned on Rocket.

"I can already tell we might need seperate rooms..." muttered Sombra, looking to her right and seeing a figure walking towards them. And as if it could have been anyone else, it was the turian from last night. Luckily for the group, it didn't seem like he heard Rocket's fawning.

"I see you've arrived in one piece." said the turian. Fox could see Rocket's point. The guy's voice purred in just the right way.

"That we have. Garrus, right?" asked Fox, considering offering him a handshake, but neglecting it due to not being sure it would work due to turians having three fingers.

"Well you've already got the name down perfectly. Already looking like this'll turn out okay." said Garrus, still wearing the same blue armour as the night before.

'What is with these people and wearing the same outfit all the time...' thought Fox to himself. Then he remembered he was in his usual flight uniform and proceeded to scold himself in his head.

"C'mon, the Commander wants to see you on the ship." The crew did as they were told and followed Garrus, Fox opting to walk beside the turian as they went into the hangar.

"So, what's a turian doing on a Cerberus mission?" asked Fox, having to properly look upwards at someone for the first time in a while.

"Cage and I have some history. I worked with her a couple years back dealing with a guy called Saren. It was me, her and a krogan who took him down. Despite the stereotype of all krogan being 'shoot first, ask questions later', he was probably the nicest guy on the old ship. But anyways, Cage picked me up by accident. I was basically I vigilante on Omega and got noticed by Cerberus. Cage picked me up when I came up on her list. Ten minutes later I took a rocket to the skull, thus the scars. We're still friends though, but I've brought up how everything was fine before she showed up a good few times. She's been taking it well though." Explained Garrus, pushing a few buttons at the hangar.

"Tough sonuvabitch, eh?" Said Fox, eagerly awaiting the door opening.

"Y'know, that's the same thing Jacob said to me. Nice guy, you'd probably like him."

Before Fox could hammer out a sentence, the doors to the hangar opened, and Fox went dead silent in awe. The Cerberus vessel wasn't as big as he imagined, but the damn thing was gorgeous. Wide at the back, tight at the front with two cannons tucked neatly underneath the nose. Painted light grey and black with small strokes of yellow, the ship flew the flag of Cerberus with pride. Only minor issue Fox had with the design was that the wings were almost hilariously large, but the vulpine knew it was for good reason.

"Well McCloud, welcome to the Normandy." Remarked Garrus, tapping Fox on the shoulder after a couple seconds of him just staring, before ushering them over to a nearby elevator.  
\---------------------------  
Walking into the Normandy, Fox was greeted by a corridor full of crewmen in chairs probably operating some systems. Beyond that was a hologram of the ship followed by two doors, the one on the left having a makeshift sign saying 'Mordin's Lab: CURRENTLY WORKING. PLEASE COME BACK LATER :)' on it.

"Ship's nice and all, but do we have any drinks?" Asked Rocket, looking around the corridor, just waiting for one of the crewmen to give him a dirty look.

"Closest thing we have is the food down a level, but I'd just say stash your own stuff. The food's ass. Plus our head chef doesn't do dextro stuff so that's bullshit." Complained Garrus, emphasising ass dramatically.

"I'm sure we can work something out between us." Bargained the raccoon, his intentions clear to his team.

"Well, if you're sure we can then why the hell not?"

Garrus and the team took the door to the right before taking a left and being met by a guy standing next to a locked door.

"So uh... You're just standing here, Jacob?" Asked Garrus, double checking to make sure the door was locked.

"Uh-huh. Commander's having a bit of a meeting with the Illusive Man." Replied Jacob, nonchalantly.

Then Sombra burst into uncontrollable laughter, leaning on Fox's shoulder and punching the wall.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Your boss is called the Illusive Man!? BAHAHAHAH" hollered the hacker.

"Literally the same reaction I had when I got the job!" chuckled Jacob. "Oh crap, forgot the introduction. Jacob Taylor, I do weapons here."

"Oh, so you're the one I'm supposed to replace." Said Rocket, arms folded.

"Wait, what?" Questioned Jacob, confused.

"Oh Cage said that she wanted me onboard because I'm good with putting together weapons and yours suck."

Jacob didn't say anything, but he was visually miffed. The door next to the crew opened, with Cassie walking through the door. She was in an N7 hoodie over a black t-shirt and some jeans.

"So uh... Commander. How'd it go?" Asked Jacob, taking it slow just in case some shit happened in there.

"Well. It was productive, to say the least." Muttered Cassie, rubbing the back of her neck.

"I'm guessing he wants us to head somewhere now?"

"Yeah. The Horizon colony, NOT THE MOON ONE, got attacked. Almost defiantly the Collectors and we're being sent to check it out."

"I'll tag along." Volunteered Rocket.

"Got it. Jacob, you're friends with Grunt, right?" Asked the commander. Jacob nodded slightly, but was visually somewhat worried. "Yeah, tell him he's coming along. He'd be fun to have around. And go tell Joker to prep for launch, will ya?"

"You got it, Commander." Replied Jacob, saluting.

"You don't have to keep doing that, Y'know?"

"Feels good!"

Fox raised his hand like he was back in school. His first one, not the last one that went to shit.

"Yeah, so where am I staying?" Asked McCloud.

"Observation room's free. It's yours." Rushed out Cassie.

"And us?" Said Sombra, irritated.

"There's a room down in the Engineering deck that's free. Take a right when you come out of the elevator, it'd be perfect for you and Rocket." Butted in Garrus

"Yeah I'll get us set up down there." Sombra took Rocket's bag and made a beeline for the elevator.

"Alright, people. Mini-meeting's finished." Joked Cassie as the group broke up.

About fifteen minutes later, the Normandy was given the all green to depart from nowhere, England. It slowly crept out of the hangar, giving itself a hundred meters or so to point upward towards the sky. The engine began to roar, and the Normandy shot up into the air, hurtling upwards to space in a matter of seconds. Fox looked outside the lone window of the observation desk as the moon quickly came out of view. Unpacking his bag and whipping out his Predator, the closest thing he had to remind him of Wolf.

Shit. He was fawning over him again.


	2. Horizon Point A

Like, fifteen minutes ago

"Lilith, we have a problem". Lieutenant Major Commander Kaiden Alenko, the man with the oddly shaped hair was off wandering the premises of the Horizon colony, a quiet little place that seemed isolated from the rest of the Galaxy. Air temperature was about average, clear blue skies, green as far as the eye could see. Kaiden opted to go out in heavy Onyx armor, since if it was any warmer he'd feel like he'd be boiled alive.

"Still can't calibrate the targeting matrix?" Replied Lilith, whose significance in this story is so minimal it's not really worth it trying to describe how she looks. I had to look up what her name was. I can recall everything except her name.

"Well those defense towers are useless if we don't have them online." Explained Kaiden, whose tone reflected a man who clearly had to put up with enough shit every day.

"Sorry, Commander, but getting our comm systems back up and running takes priority."

"Yeah, okay. Surprised they haven't tried to blame that on me yet." Muttered the L2 biotic.

"People out here don't trust the Alliance. It's nothing personal" said Lilith, softly.

Kaiden scoffed, barely containing his laughter. "Nothing personal? Lilith, that creepy mechanic said my mom was fat, now THAT'S fucked up."

Lilith sighed, resting her hands on her hips.

Suddenly, the sky started turning into a brooding reddish-brown. Looking up into the sky, the pair could see some sort of ship cloaked in the clouds. Kaiden reached around his back and whipped out an Avenger, peering through it's built in scope to take a closer look. After trying to get a glimpse of the ship for a few seconds, Kaiden spotted something coming from it. Small clouds of static from a distance.

Kaiden looked out of the scope, before looking back over to Lilith. "Get everyone back to the safehouse." Said Alenko, sternly.

Lilith stared in terror as the ship reared its ugly head. A twisted monstrosity of metal, rock and what looked like flesh from a distance. Lilith turned around to see Kaiden, but had to turn a bit more as she saw him and three other people already far away.

"FUCKING RUN FOR YOUR LIVES. ITS THE APPETIZER." Screamed Kaiden from a distance.

Lilith, finally using common sense, legged it after Kaiden. As she ran, she saw other colonists suffer from the horror movie trope of falling over at crucial times before being swarmed by the... Swarms. yea. Unfortunately for Lilith, she was not exempt from this fate. Tripping over nothing, she crashed to the ground. The second she hit the floor, she could feel herself getting stung from all sides. Attempting to scream, she quickly felt her muscles tense up to the point it was impossible to move. As one of the bugs, a yellow quadreped looking creature made its way along her face, she could faintly see a black hue taking over her. Then, nothing.

Like, now. The Normandy.

Professor Mordin Solus, the scientist Salarian that Cassie and her team had picked up from the shithole called Omega looked on while his test subject banged against its glass container. The... Thingy (A name given by the crew following an intense meeting in the comm room) was four legged, yellow, winged and judging by the past few days, uber-aggressive. Mordin made sure to feed it, because he's nice like that. The rest of the crew never dared asked where he picked it up. In walked Cassie, holding a shotgun that was folded up and ready to be unpacked and put into action. Probably one of the lousy Katanas that were given by Cerberus, unless the commander had picked up something like an Eviscerator last time they were on the Citadel, but that seemed unlikely.

"Mordin, you got the countermeasure ready yet? Kinda need it right now" asked Commander Cage, not paying too much attention to the containment case.

Mordin looked at the Commander for a second before giving her an adorable smile as he turned to a computer to his left. "Yes." He said, before throwing up a hologram of Cassie's N7-branded armor, the shill.

Horizon, Iera System

The shuttle door swung open, Cassie being the first one to step out. The first thing she took notice of was how desolate the place was. From first impressions, one would be justified in thinking the place had been abandoned for a few years. The buildings, ground and sky had turned into a murky brown. Looking up to the sky, Cassie took notice of the foreboding structure in the distance. Best guess was that it was at least several hundred feet in height. It pierced the sky, at least. Yellow lightning shot through the gap in the sky every couple of seconds, but it was never lengthy enough to be of any actual danger. The structure itself looked grotesque though. Cassie quickly dropped her attention on that to take notice of he large shadow looming over her.

"Huh. Looks stupid." Grumbled Grunt, the team Krogan. Cage had only woken him up from his tube three days ago, but she already felt like they were going to get on well. She already came to the conclusion he was always pissed off about something, though. Suppose it helped that he was a 'shoot first, keep shooting' kind of guy, probably good for reliving stress. He made up half of the Krogan that she knew on a personal level, the other being Urdnot Wrex, the closest thing to a best friend she had in space. Garrus was a close second, though.

Cassie turned to talk to the berserker. From her past conversations with Wrex, she learnt that it was probably best to focus on one eye, given how they looked on Krogans. Looking straight into their face always came off as disrespectful to her. "And we'll probably blow it up, if it makes you feel better." Joked the Commander, reaching behind her back and whipping out a shotgun. A Katana, in case you were paying attention. You were, I'm sorry.

"Heh, heh. Deal." Snickered Grunt. Damn, that laugh was cute.

"Luckily for both of you, blowing shit up seems to be a specialty of mine." Commented Rocket, examining his two pistols throughly.

It was almost unfair to compare Rocket and Grunt in terms of height.

"Hah! I like this guy already!" Bellowed Grunt, eagerly pumping his own Katana like it was a super soaker, a thermal clip falling to the ground, singeing the grass a little.

Cassie looked around and took notice of the bugs hovering around in the sky. Obviously, since they weren't dead yet, it meant Mordin's countermeasure was working.

"Doc, whatever you did, it's working." said Cage, turning to wave the shuttle goodbye as it took off.

"Ah, excellent. Didn't run many proper tests. Worried you would be killed." yammered Mordin through the comms.

"Gee, thanks Mordin." Responded the commander dryly, shutting off her comm. "Right, people. We get in, get out, get evidence of Collectors existing, deal?"

"Sounds doable." Answered Rocket, lagging behind as Cassie took point.

Wandering along a slight hill and past a few containers, the swuad stumbled across a clearing with suspiciously placed crates and other crap. Given how every other firefight turned out in her life, Cage readied her trigger finger, almost certain that at any moment something would jump out and attack. Sure enough, she was right. She heard a long groan, before turning to face it andinstinctively pulling the trigger, which was met with a sickening mess of noise. 'Shit.'

"Husks..." started the commander, tepidly prodding it with her boot. "Well, at least it confirms that the Collectors and Reapers are working together. Joy..."

Rocket shrugged. "Well, of course they would. Assholes work with assholes."

"Doesn't make any sense though. Last time I checked, husks were impaled on spikes first, or is that something else I missed while I've been dead?"

Rocket and Grunt looked at each other, blankly. "I think you're asking the wrong people here, Cage." Muttered the former Guardian. "Let's just keep going. I'd rather not hang around this shithole."

With that, the team went onwards. Wandering through what felt like apartments, they helped themselves to any loose change that was lying around. Besides, they didn't find anyone anywhere, what were they going to do? Call the cops? They went forward into another clearing, not thinking too much of it. However, that was short lived as the FUCKING COLLECTORS DROPPED DOWN. HOLY SHIT.

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST." Yelled Cassie, shocked by this hastily crammed in section. She rolled behind some crates, not fazed by the yellow beams whizzing past her head. Realising that her shotgun would be worthless in a fight like this (Unlike the ME1 kind. Seriously I was sniping people with those things.), she swapped over to her Predator sidearm, peeking up and taking a few potshots at the bugs. "Spam every single thing you have, people!" Ordered Cage, vaulting over her cover and beating a Collector over the head with her riot baton she insisted she carried everywhere. While it was down, Cassie put a bullet in the back of its head before spinning on her heel to expertly put a set of bullets in between the eyes of two collectors.

Rocket, predictably, was yelling the whole time, blindly firing into anything that moved. He had two pistols, might as well go nuts. To his credit, he was dead accurate, nailing three Collectors in the head. Grunt, was less clean. Matching Rocket in excessive yelling, but in this case he was just charging into everything. Mostly followed by a shotgun blast to the chest.

One of the Collectors, probably scared shitless at this point, began to glow an ominous yellow.

"SUP WE'RE HARBINGER" bellowed the Collector, looking mostly the same but he glowed a little. Grunt responded by upper cutting the thing's head clean off.

Cassie did a full 360 sweep of the area, scanning for any other Collectors. "We're in the green, people. Nice work." Complimented Cage, finger-gunning to a nearby door. The door had a green light on the front of it, so of course it would open. The trio went over to the door, Grunt and Cassie taking either side of it. Rocket had to hop a little to reach the panel, but tapped it regardless, the doors opening with a satisfying 'swoosh'.

Rocket made his way down a few steps of stairs, holding out one of his pistols, finger dancing on the trigger. Hearing some light shuffling from behind about the fifteen-thousandth crate, Rocket pinpointed the noise's location instantly.

"Out from behind the damn box pal, or this ain't gonna end with you looking too good." Commanded the raccoon, squaring his sight onto the hat and set of eyes that came peering from behind the crate. Rocket jerked his pistol sideways, basically telling the guy 'Get the fuck out here'. Cassie and Grunt followed behind him, the commander stepping forward and placing her hand on Rocket's shoulder, indirectly telling him to back down. Rocket begrudgingly lowered his weapon, but kept it in his hand just in case this guy tried anything funny.

"W-what? You're... Human. The hell are you doing here, you'll lead them right here!" Stammered the colonist, walking out from behind the crate so they could have a semi-coherent conversation.

"Yeah, there's like twenty dead Collectors out there right now. A thanks would be nice..." Groaned the commander.

The colonist stepped back a little. "Those things are Collectors?" He turned on one foot to face away from the group. "You mean they're real? I thought they were made up, Y'know? Propaganda to keep us in Alliance space"

Cassie let out a sigh of frustration, looking over to Grunt while they both had 'dude ur so stupid' looks on their faces. "Yes. They're Collectors" she said, exasperated.

"Shit... They got Lilith! A-and Sten too! Hell, the got damn near everybody!" The colonist's voice was slowly being drained of breath. "Damn it, it's that Major Alenko's fault! He's the one that built those defense towers, he made us a target!"

Cassie's interest was peaked. 'Kaiden?' Last she saw of him was the Normandy getting blown up. At the same time, she knew that those defense towers were important, given her usual routine of missions.

"Yeah, I'll get those defense towers online so I can leave here quicker." Said Cassie, near emotionless.

"They're just up ahead, turn on the console and they'll be up and running." Answered the colonist, watching on as the squad exited the building.

"Look, just stay here and don't do anything else, got it?" Cassie shut the door before she could get a solid reply.

Taking a quick glance behind to make sure the door was closed, Grunt sighed. "He's going to follow us, isn't he?"

"And I'm already preparing my response."

Taking a power walk to the turret, the team, got closer to the Collector ship. The thing was comparable to a skyscraper up close. The main control panel wait right in the heart of yet another clearing with guess what, MORE CRATES!

"Rocket, think you can take a look at this?" Asked Cassie, pointing over to the main console.

Rocket gave the commander a cocky smile and cracked his fingers. "Really? This is basic stuff." Said Rocket, strutting over to the console and going to work. His fingers danced over the keyboard. No hesitation, no slip ups. His eyes were firmly glued to the screen, treating it like another thing trying to kill him. "Won't even know we were here."

Before Cassie could come out with a witty remark, Rocket dramatically finished off on the keyboard (make of that what you will) t

urning around and smiling from ear to ear. "Done." He chirped, proudly putting his hands on his hips. "Now, we sit back and watch the fireworks." Just as Rocket finished that sentence, the Collector ship took off, disappearing through the sky. Rocket turned around after noticing his teammates' jaws wide open. His grin soon fell off a cliff. "OH COME ON." He yelled, hands on his forehead.

That colonist predictably ran out from behind them. "Damn it, they're gone! All of them, gone!" He yelled.

"LOOK AT THAT SHIP. WHAT THE HELL WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO ABOUT IT?" Yelled Cassie.

"Heh, heh. Told ya he'd follow us, Cage." Giggled Grunt.

The colonist turned around. "Wait, COMMANDER Cage?" He whimpered.

"Actually, Commander Cassandra Cage. Hero of the Citadel and the first human Spectre, Delan." It was Kaiden! WHO CAME FROM BEHIND A CRATE FOR FUCKS SAKE. Kaiden walked over to Delan, before decking him in the face with a right hook. "That's for calling my mom fat, asshole." He hissed.

"Kaiden." Said Cassie, relieved.

"Cage, been a while." Replied Kaiden, looking decently happy.

"Two years! Last time we met I was in my first life!" Joked Cage. Got a decent chuckle out of Kaiden, so it worked.

"Yeah and now you're back!... With Cerberus..." Kaiden's tone dropped to a more concerned murmur.

"Yeah. About that."

"Look, Cage. I trust the hell outta you. You're probably my best friend right now. I'm just worried."

"Don't be. Honestly, I don't trust Cerberus. They're totally gonna fuck us over at some point. I'll feed the Alliance any dirt I can pick up."

Kaiden looked a bit surprised. "Oh... Uh... You do that."

"Trust me Kaiden, in a few months time we'll probably be kicking their asses and it'll be great."

Kaiden took a few steps back. "Sounds good.. So uh, I'll just forward this to Hackett and get a lift off here. So, see you in like six months?"

"Deal Alenko."

Kaiden stepped over Delan's body and wandered to the back.

"Rocket, call for the shuttle. Don't want to be here much longer."


	3. Dossiers: A Filler Chapter

Games » Star Fox » StarFox: These Crossovers are weird  
Author: ButtonFan20   
Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Reviews: 1 - Published: 08-18-18 - Updated: 12-18-18 id:13039591  
Cage tapped her toes impatiently waiting for the hologram to pop up. Far as she knew, the Horizon report was sent out and had already reached the Illusive Man, given how quickly he tended to respond to her previous ones. Meeting back up with Kaiden went far better than she expected. She was already bracing herself for meeting back up with her old crewmates. After what felt like an eternity, but what was actually a dozen or so seconds, the man she wanted to see popped up all digitized n' stuff. Despite the pale blue of the holo, his distractingly bright blue eyes were noticeable. He was looking down, having yet another smoke.

"Commander, good work there down on Horizon." he started, stopping in order to huff out a little smoke. "Hopefully, the Collectors will think twice before attacking another colony."

"People still died, you know. We're looking at 80% gone." responded Cassie in a matter-of-fact tone.

"It's better than what we've been doing since the abductions started, so you and your team are already making a difference. The Collectors will be much more careful now, so we may have a way to lure them in."

Cassie sighed. "If this ends up with me putting myself as bait, then you'll need to go back to the drawing board."

The Illusive Man squished a cigarette butt on the ash tray he kept next to him. "I've been devising ways to bring them in, but I'll come back to you when the time's right.

"So, anything else on the agenda?"

"I'm letting you know that I'm diverting all resources to finding a way through the Omega 4 Relay. The one thing I'm certain on is that we need to hit them where they live. You and your team will need to be strong, as will their resolve. There's no looking back. As you're probably well aware, once you go through the Omega 4 Relay... there's no guarantee you'll return. To have any hope of surviving, you – and your entire team – must be fully committed to this."

"I'll worry about my team, you keep working on finding us a way through." said Cage, confidently.

"I just want to be upfront about your odds. You'll need everyone at their best. I've taken the liberty to forward you more dossiers. Keep building your team, Commander."

"Uh, thanks."

"And be careful, Commander. The Collectors will be watching you." The holo shut off just after that.

Cassie turned on her heel, huffing 'dick' to herself. She yelped in shock as Jacob stood in front of her, arms folded. "Jeezus... Christ, Jacob!" she uttered. "How long have you been standing there!?"

"Just got in. Didn't want to butt in on your talk but I needed to let you know I got the dossiers sent to me via Miranda." Said Jacob, looking guilty and sounding apologetic.

"J-just, don't pull something like that again, okay?"

"Yeah, again sorry." Jacob's posture eased up and his hands fell back down to his sides. "But we're really gonna do it, huh? Take the fight to the Collectors in person? I'm looking forward to the action. But seeing what those bastards did on Horizon... really makes you think."

Cassie shrugged her shoulders. "Well unless we get a drastic change in plans, yeah. That's the idea."

"Gotcha. Horizon kinda hit home, y'know? What we're doing, what we're up against... Listen, I'm gonna go take care of some unfinished business. Try get some... closure, you know? Imagine everyone else is going to also." Cassie silently nodded, After some uncomfortable silence, Jacob reached into his pocket. Which, as we all know by know, is an endless void where anything can fit in as long as it's somewhat important to the plot. "Anyways, here's the dossiers. Given how many people we're taking aboard I say we just take four of 'em. Stop overcrowding the place."

"Gotcha, call me if you need anything." responded Cassie, taking a quick glance at the dossiers before watching Jacob bolt out of the door. She presumed he was faintly embarrassed.

Cassie sat up against the meeting desk, ready to start reading through the dossiers.

Thane Krios

\- Quick-kill biotic specialist

\- Expert sniper

Thane Krios is a drell trained from childhood as an elite assassin, proficient in both long-range sniping kills and close infiltration. He has slowed his activities in recent years but is rumored to have a target on Illium.

'An assassin, one with half-decent biotics could be real handy in a firefight. Fuck it, I'll take him.'

Cassie left Thane's file to the left, leaving a mental footnote that anyone that ended up there would join them. She scanned the next one, growing curious.

Ana Amari (Currently operating under the alias of 'Shrike)

\- Fourty years of combat experience

\- Infamous sniper

\- Remarkable healing capabilites

The former second-in-command of Overwatch prior to its shutdown, Captain Amari has been highlighted as an incredible soldier with sniping capabilities thought only possible with genetic altering. She has agreed to join the team, rapidly saying that she is completely committed to the mission. She is currently awaiting pickup on Illium.

'Conviant that she's on Illium. Still, if she's got that much history and stuff on her side, it's hard for me to just pass up on that.'

Cassie left the file on top of Thane's, confident in her new pickup's capabilities.

Justicar Samara

\- Biotics strength near that of an asari matriarch

\- Extensive weapons training

Samara is a justicar, a rare member of an asari monastic group trained in enhanced combat biotics alongside standard weapons. Samara was recently sighted on Illium, outside normal asari space

'Seriously, what is with all of these people and Illium... Doesn't help that we've already got enough weapons experts and then there's Jack, who's like a Biotic on steroids...'

Cassie left Samara's file on her lap, unsure what to do with it.

Tali'Zorah vas Neema

\- Expert in combat tech, systems hacking

\- Strong engineering background, familiar with Normandy

Formerly listed as Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, the quarian engineer earned her adult name after helping Cage defeat Saren two years ago. Tali is currently on a classified assignment for the Migrant Fleet Admiralty Board on Haestrom, deep in geth-controlled space.

'Huh. Tali? Well, shit, get back aboard!' By this point, Cage was practically talking to herself. Cassie swiftly placed Tali's dossier over to the left, thankful to have someone she recognized on the team. Then she turned over to the next one...

Takahashi Takeda

\- Former member of Cage's team, pre N7.

\- Rare telekinetic abilities comparable to biotics.

Trained in combat since his youth, Takeda has previously worked with Cage as part of her Special Forces unit. Currently awaiting pickup on Illium, he has agreed to join the team on the grounds he work exclusively under Cage.

'What the- Takeda?'

Due to her promotion to an N7, being chosen to spearhead Humanity's push on the galactic stage, Cassie hadn't seen Takeda in nearly three years. Why was he even on Illium? Cassie looked down on her former partner's dossier, conflicted. There was an argument to be made that Samara was a better option, but given what she knew about Justicars from her post-defeating Saren party, where she had listened to Liara talk about them to try drown out a drunk off his ass Kaiden singing Boys II Men, she had the sinking feeling that it'd do more harm than good. Plus, she trusted Takeda a hell of a lot more then most other people. Swallowing dramatically, sighing afterwards, she put Takeda's dossier down on the left. Cassie left Samara's behind as she picked up the other four and held them underneath her arm. Two Snipers and two friends.

Cassie wondered what the hell she was even doing anymore.


	4. The Assassin

Fox leaned back against one of the support pillars of the Normandy's CIC, arms folded and legs crossed. EDI, the ship's computer (Who I haven't mentioned yet... Look, she's low on my priority list in terms of characters okay?) let him know that he was wanted by Cage to be brought along for picking up whoever was next on the recruitment list. Slightly agitated, he whipped out his blaster, twirling it on his finger and stopping it rhythmically. Taking notice of the swoosh coming from the left. Fox darted his head in that direction, the commander walking out carrying a folded-up assault rifle, if Fox was to hazard a guess.

Cage had altered her get-up by this point (Asymmetric defense layer, Aegis vest, damping gauntlets and stimulator conduits, for an in-game aesthetic.) but looked more relaxed than the last time the two met up.

"You wanted to see me?" questioned Fox, pushing himself off the pillar before walking over to the exit.

"Yeah. Felt like you needed to see some action. Besides, best way to get to know someone is when everything's trying to kill you." joked Cassie, nudging Fox's arm before handing him the fold-up. "Rocket had a look at that Vindicator, should be all good for you to use."

Fox shrugged and slung it above his ass... Y'know, I always wondered how characters were able to just holster weapons on their backs in the games...

Fox pulled down his fingerless gloves, tightening them but making them more comfortable. "So, what's the plan?"

"Well the good news is that we've only really got to talk to two of these guys since they're already signed on and we just need to sign off on it. But we'll need to look around for an assassin, which should be fun." groaned Cage, rolling her eyes at the end.

Fox raised an eyebrow. "Assassin? I don't think that'll be an easy pickup..."

"It'll go one of two ways. Either we spend the next week hunting him down before realizing that he's been off-world for two days or we'll find him right away."

"And if neither happens?"

"Then we'll just drop it and keep moving forward."

The two made their way towards the Normandy's exit, before Cassie let Fox get ahead by a step before putting a hand on his chest, blocking him off.

"Wait, we're waiting for someone." said Cage, prompting a huff from the fox, who turned on his heel and almost jumped when he saw that who they were waiting for was already standing there, arms folded and looking slightly pissed. Hair shaven, a shit ton of tattoos everywhere and... revealing clothing was a combination Fox never thought he'd see, but yet here he was.

"Jack, sleep well?" asked the commander, turning around to face the criminal.

"Best I can given how the two above me never know when to shut up." groaned Jack, rolling her eyes. "Who's this?"

Fox tugged his jacket collar before stretching out his hand. "Fox... we'll be working together for this mission." stammered Fox awkwardly.

Jack just looked over at Cassie, still visually stumped. "Cage, I don't know what you're expecting bringing the guy who's species has jacked up sex drives, but I'm not getting involved." she muttered, walking through the two of them and over to the exit.

"Jack, that's just a myth." responded the commander, whipping out a pair of sunglasses from the void that is her pocket and putting them on.

"Yeah... she's right. Lylatians have a higher drive than most of other species..." butted in Fox, raising a finger. Despite being behind her, Fox could tell Cage was a bit disappointed in herself for getting that wrong.

"Joker, don't do anything stupid while we're getting that new armor put on." Cassie received a subdued 'yeah' before she opened up the door to the outside world. The group was met by a gust of warm air. Walking out, the corridor was engulfed with amber brought upon it by the Illium sunset to the left. The trio walked forward, being joined by two LOKI mechs and an Asari walking towards them. Given how the mechs weren't firing at them, they were friendly. The two groups met in the middle of the hallway.

"Welcome to Nos Astra, commander." started the Asari, giving the group a polite nod. "We've been instructed to waive all docking and administration fees for your visit."

"Hang on, who's paying for all this?" asked the confused commander.

"The order came from Liara T'Soni, who paid all the fees on your behalf." the concierge fiddled with a few things on her Omni-tool. "She's also asked that I direct you to speak with her at your convenience. Her office is just past the trading floor."

"Thanks for the head's up."

"Anytime. Welcome to our city, commander and enjoy your stay." the concierge left with that.

"I'm guessing this Liara and you know each other?" asked Fox.

"Yeah. Old team-mate of mine. Haven't heard a thing from her since I straight-up died, but that's besides the point."

Before the trio could leave, Fox picked up on someone walking up behind them. He turned his head slowly to try avoid raising suspicion.

"Yeah... I heard you died." came the voice from behind them.

The trio turned, Cassie's face lighting up.

"Takeda, you sonuva bitch!" laughed Cassie, high fiving her old squadmate before pulling him into a one-armed hug. "See you haven't changed much in three years."

She was true, in fact. Takeda had essentially become immune to the process of aging, looking as young as he did the last time the two were together. Hadn't bothered to change up his get-up either, same tight bodysuit with pieces of armor on his shoulders and chest. Same old headband and neckscarf as well. "Doesn't really feel like three years." answered the telepath, shrugging his shoulders before being let out of the hug.

"Jack, Fox, this man right here is Takeda. Mind-reader and all-round badass. Plus, his ass is okay if you're into that." said Cassie. "Well shit, how ya been?"

"I've been well. Not gonna lie, kinda missed you after you got the promotion. Team got disbanded and everything." responded Takeda, earning a raised eyebrow from Cage.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. After that I lost contact with Jin and Jacqui got posted up at Grissom Academy, the biotic school."

Cassie sighed in frustration. "Never got told."

"Wouldn't expect you would, off saving the friggen' galaxy and everything."

"You know I would've jumped at the chance to work with you guys again."

Jack groaned. "We can all talk about our fucking issues later. In case anyone's forgotten, we're looking for a guy."

Cassie stammered a little before tapping Takeda from behind the shoulder. "C'mon, we got work to do."

"You're bringing more than two people with you?" asked Jack, joining up at the front.

"What? Can't break the mold every once in a while?"said the commander, walking through another corridor and onto the main trading floor.

She stopped to take in the view, the sunset piercing through a distant skyscraper and painting the trading floor amber. Cassie lingered on the view as she turned to head down past the many kiosks. Zeroing in on a staircase about twenty meters ahead of her, she immediately fancied her chances.

Cassie nudged her way through the crowds, including past an Asari who seemed intent on speaking to her. Probably wouldn't be crucial info, anyways. Getting to the bottom of the staircase, she was met with a blast of cool air hitting her in the face. The group clambered up the stairs, taking no notice of the receptionist guarding the door. Cassie practically barged in, stopping to see Liara in the middle of a call.

"Have you faced an Asari Commando unit before? Few humans have." threatened Liara, making sure her tone still had power despite being relatively subdued. "I'll make it simple. Either you pay me, or I flay you alive. With my mind." Liara ended the call, turning on her heel and meeting the commander dead on, who smirked and tipped her head. "Cage!" she yelped, practically crushing her demeanor of badassery from moments ago. "Nyxeris, hold my calls."

Cassie went for a Predator-esque handshake, only to be met by a confused glare. Liara went back to her office's chair, spinning around the chair that had been facing a window overlooking the trading floors. "My sources said you were alive but... It's nice to see you again."

"You've got sources now?" asked Cassie, arms folded.

"Several. Even a bit of hired muscle. The perks of being an information broker. It's paid the bills since you..." She stopped, almost entering a mini-reflection. "Well, for the past two years. And now you're back, gunning for the Collectors with Cerberus."

"That isn't readily available info."

"Neither is you being alive." Liara responded immediately. Information is my business now. And if you need help finding people, I can be of assistance."

Fox stepped forward. "Well that's a relief. Saves us having to run around town." he joked, earning an awkward silence from the rest of the team.

"Ah, Mr. McCloud. I've heard of what you've done for your system. I must say, it's an honor to meet you." beamed the doctor.

"Likewise. But let's cut to the chase, we're looking for people and we'll need your help tracking them."

"I have tabs on people coming in and out of Nos Astra, name?"

"I'm looking for someone calling themselves Shrike." replied the commander.

"Captain Amari? Yes, she's been hanging around the bar below recently. I can arrange a meet-up at your convenience.

"That'd be great, Liara."

Takeda, rubbing the back of his head, inserted himself into the conversation. "Wait, we're picking her up?"

"Let me guess, you've had a few run-ins."

"Oh, I just know who she is. Been doing alot of vigilante work recently. Not an assassin since there's a fairly low body count and even then, it's all tied to the Eclipse. If she's on our radar, then we've got a capable worker with us." Takeda stepped back, mentally lowering his significance in this conversation.

"Speaking of assassins, we need to pick up a drell that passed through here."

"Krios, right? Yes, he arrived here a few days ago. My sources tell me he may be targeting a corporate executive, Nassana Dantius."

Cassie raised an eyebrow. "Dantius? Didn't she want us to take out her sister a couple of years back?" she asked, getting slightly closer to Liara.

"Yes. It's probably for the best that we turned her offer down." Liara adjusted her seat, relaxing her muscles. "He contacted a woman names Seryna. She has an office in the lower cargo area, she'll tell you where to go."

"Thanks for the help. If I can do anything while I'm here, I'm all ears." asked Cassie, turning to leave.

"Nothing I can't handle. But I'd advise going after Thane as fast as possible. He left for Dantius Towers about two hours ago, if you want to intercept him you'll need to get there, fast." caled Liara as Cassie and her team left her office.

The group half jogged, half ran to the lower cargo area, trusting Cassie's natural instinct of knowing where to go at just the right time. Eventually, after an uneventful wander through the trading floor's underbelly, they ran into a fairly open office space with two Asari behind monitors. Cassie took a wild guess and approached the first person she saw.

"You Seryna?" she asked, trying to assert some dominance in the conversation.

"Who wants to know?" snapped back Seryna, not looking back up from her monitor.

Cassie sighed in frustration. "I do. Liara said you know something about Thane Krios."

Seryna got up from her desk. "Tana, cover for me." she said to the other Asari working there, before motioning for the group to follow her over to the hover car. "Yeah, I know who Thane Krios is, but I didn't hire him. What do you want to know?"

"We were hoping you'd help us find him." groaned Jack from behind, her arms still folded and hitting Seryna with a death stare.

"I can tell you about him, but you're not going to stop him. I dropped him off two hours ago and that man never gives up on a job."

"We're not trying to stop him. We're just here to pick him up for a job he might be interested in." said Fox this time, thinking that they were taking turns in talking.

"I ran security for Nassana Dantius, found out about her killing her employees to cover up her dirty secrets. Fired me when I confronted her, her loss. Could've stopped Thane from taking her down." continued Seryna, ignoring Fox entirely.

"Then what're we up against?" continued the furry.

"Eclipse mercs. High-tech killers. Undisciplined, but well equipped. They don't care much who they kill, as long as they're paid."

"So basically every run of the mill merc band?" joked Takeda, earning a slight grin from everyone besides Jack, still intently staring into the soul of Seryna.

"Thane didn't seem phased by it. Doubt it'll get into your way much."

Cassie walked over to the first hovercar she saw, making it clear that she wanted the team to move out immediately.

"So where can we find Thane?" she asked, leaning next to the car.

"The Dantius towers. Penthouse level of Tower One. There's a second tower that's still under construction, if Thane's smart he'll go there."

Cassie opened the door to the hovercar, the top of it folding outwards. "We need to get to the roof of that building then, fast."

"You're desperate to see him, aren't you?"

Cassie silently nodded, letting the rest of the group form up around her. "Got any other info about him?" she asked, casually taking out a pistol from behind her back and fiddling with it.

"Not much. He did say he wasn't doing the hit for the money. Nobody hired him. I wanted to know who I was helping, but he said he was doing this on his own. That he had to 'restore the balance of his life'" Seryna stepped back ever so slightly, shrugging her shoulders. "Maybe he's crazy. If he takes out Nasanna, I don't care how why he does it."

"Well, if it makes him feel a bit better, it sounds okay."

"Look, I'm up to my head in work right now so you're going to have to go it alone." murmured Seryna.

Fox huffed happily, presenting himself with more gravitas. "Luckily for us, we've got one of the best pilots in the galaxy with us."

Seryna nodded blankly, turning to walk back to her office space. "Alright..." she started, somewhat concerned. "Good luck out there, ma'am."

The sky of Illium became oddly dark almost instantly, covering the city in a blanket of darkness, only being illuminated by neon advertising boards and swarms of hovercars dancing through the sky, taillights lighting the way.

In the back, Jack and Takeda sat together, not exchanging glances. Jack drummed her fingers on the seat between them, eyes focused on the Illium skyline. Takeda awkwardly held an M-3 Shuriken, constantly adjusting his grip and taking a few precautionary quickdraws.

"Don't shoot your eye out." commanded Jack dully, cocking an eyebrow at Takeda.

"Look I'm sorry but I've never used a gun before." responded Takeda, somewhat apologetically.

"If you can't shoot for shit, why are you here?"

Cassie let a small laugh escape her mouth from the front of the car. "Because he can read minds and whip people to death." she joked.

"So we're gonna offer them some BDSM and then BAM. Fling the bastards over a balcony!"

"Hey, whatever works!"

Fox nudged Cassie's shoulder, keeping his eyes dead ahead.

"Approaching Dantius Towers, commander." remarked the pilot.

"Alright, got any decent info?" asked Cassie, taking one last stretch before being thrown into another firefight.

"Ground floor's clear but it'll take a while to get to the top of the building."

"No other options?"

"There are, but they all see us winding up dead."

Cassie mentally reaffirmed herself that this wasn't a terrible idea. "Pull us in."

Fox pulled the car out of the traffic, breaking off from the main fleet of cars heading through the city. Pulling into a convinient looking parking space, the glowing neon sign at the top of the open doorway solidified that the were at the right place. The hovercar landed softly, the top half of the car opening up, allowing the group to step outside. Cassie took point, pulling out her Katana. "Alright people," she started, waiting for the rest of the team to get armed. "We go in, find Thane, take out any asshole trying to kill us."

Glass shattered ahead of them, a pair of LOKI and FENRIS mechs charging towards them.

"So much for stealth..." muttered Takeda.

Jack cracked her fingers, shaking one off needlessly. "Oh, this is when the fun begins..." she remarked devilishly. She lifted the two FENRIS mechs up with Lift effortlessly. "Fly, BITCH." she snarled as she casually threw them over to the right. "Damn, I love my job."

The two LOKIs opened fire on the team, whiffing most of their shots, a few bouncing off Cassie's shields. The commander rushed one of the mechs, hitting it on the side of the head with her shotgun. As the mech collapsed to the floor, Cassie stood on its chest, firing into the head to finish the job.

Fox had been firing into the other mech the whole time with his Blaster, not needing to do much more to take it down. "Hostile taken care of." he called, regrouping with the team who had carried on. Cassie led the group to the left, thanks to her ability of knowing where to go at the right time. A door had been unlocked that way; a dead salarian lying beneath it.

"Damn..." whispered Cassie to herself. "Nassana's probably started a clean-up of staff."

"If we've already got dead workers, then chances are there's no point in looking for survivors." deadpanned Takeda, somewhat mourneful.

"Just another thing Nasanna's gonna answer for."

Fox opened up the door, taking point and readying his blaster as the rest of the team trailed behind him. A thin corridor led to a clearing with several construction supplies scattered around, making for good cover. Beats a bunch of crates, at least.

An Eclipse merc stood guard with a LOKI merch. Jack pushed to the front of the group and opened fire on the LOKI with her Carnifex.

"What's up, fuckers?" she yelled, darting to a pillar and hiding behind it.

Cassie hissed as a shot from the merc's Avenger grazed her shields. She took refuge behind a stack of large concrete blocks with Fox, who switched over to his Vindicator and laid out suppressing fire on the merc. Jack had jumped onto the mech, biotically punching a hole through it's head. Looking up, she saw two more LOKIs heading towards her. Instinctively, she put up a biotic barrier to protect herself from the incoming fire.

Fox had taken the shields off of the Eclipse merc, refocusing his attention to the two LOKIs in the distance.

"Shields are down!" called out the merc, looking to make a retreat back to the main squad. He ran to try get away; joined by a spike that now pierced his chest. He let out a quick yelp before being pulled back into the fight. Takeda picked him up off his feet, quickly snapping his neck. "Okay, admit it. THAT was cool." he said to Cassie, who was busy vaulting over her concrete block.

"WHATEVER." she yelled, charging forward towards Jack, sliding next to her and firing off two quick shots into the LOKI mechs giving her hassle.

"Yeah, I could've handled that myself." murmured Jack.

Fox had taken point once again, taking notice of three more mercs coming through a hallway. With a quickdraw, he pulled out his reflector he always had on his thigh. The bullets coming from the mercs ricocheted off the reflector, most of them ending up in the head of the one at the front.

"Damn it!" hissed a merc on the right, barely having time to react before taking a bullet to the head from the barrel of Cassie's Predator. The last one attempted to run, being pulled back by Jack's biotics, swiftly being finished off by the criminal with a double-tap to the head.

"Hang on." started Takeda, the others turning around as he led them back a few paces. "There's an elevator right here. We can fastrack our way up there. Just give me a second to get this working."

"Good catch." complimented the commander, letting Takeda get to work fixing the controls.

Fox holstered his rifle behind his back, joining up with Cassie as he did so. "Thought they would've put up more of a fight." he said confidently.

"Eclipse talk a big game but they're just like every other merc band I've fought," said Cassie, leaning against a wall with one arm and crossing her legs. "Besides, if this elevator can work then we shouldn't be here longer."

A bleeping sound could be heard from the right. "Got it!" Takeda exclaimed, the elevator door swooshing open.

"Heh, so you're not completely useless." joked Jack, being the first to take the voyage into the small box. "C'mon losers, we've got bitches to kill."

The rest of the crew followed her in, Cassie slamming her fist on the button that had 'ROOF ACCESS' drawn on it with a ballpoint pen. The rest of the buttons either didn't have a name or were plastered with a similar design. The elevator raced up to the floors, the group standing perfectly still, not making a noise.

"I haven't heard from teams four or five." The trooper paced left and right, overlooking the Illium nighttime. "Don't worry, my team's always ready to go." His call made him oblivious to the door opening behind him. "I don't know where he is, not yet." Despite turning around, he hadn't taken notice of the four people walking towards him.

Cassie signaled for the rest of her team to follow her as she crept up on the unsuspecting merc.

"It's fine, everything's under control. I'll take care of it. I'll even go down there myself."

"Turn around, very slowly."

The merc turned his head, being greeted by the team putting on their best angry faces. "Shit..."

"Have you seen the assassin?" demanded Cassie coldly.

"Why are you looking for him?" asked the merc cautiously, unknowingly backing up to the glass pane. "You're not one of Nassana's mercs, who are you?"

"I'm gonna ask you again." Cassie's voice became harsher. "Where's the assassin?"

The merc cockily crossed his arms. "I've got nothing more to say to you-"

Cassie quickly came to the conclusion she wasn't getting anything out of this. She quickly shoved him against the glass pane, kicking him in the gut and shattering it. The Eclipse mercenary went out of it, falling several stories to his presumed death.

Cassie peered over the ledge. "How 'bout 'goodbye'"?

"Bit ruthless, but it was either that or he'd call in his friends." mentioned Fox, pulling out his Vindicator once more.

Takeda had turned around and picked up a datapad, which he tucked in the back of his pocket. He tapped on a door, opening it into a clearing being lit up by a glass roof in the centre. Jack and Fox followed him through, lying in the shadows for an ambush. Cassie hid behind a stack of flat blocks, eavesdropping on the conversation in the distance.

"He's all over the place." said a trooper from across the room, standing next to a suspicious looking explosive crate.

"What do you mean?" Came another, more static voice. If anyone was to hazard a guess it was Nassana. And it was!

"We've got reports of him across all levels. We think he's heading through the ducts."

"I'm not paying you to think, just find him. NOW."

The trooper let out an audible groan, staring blankly at two others that were there. Two LOKIS and a FENRIS joined them, catching Takeda's attention.

He caught Cassie's eyes, making his intentions to blow them all to hell clear. Cassie signaled for Fox and Jack to ready their weapons, the two taking aim and ready to take out any stragglers.

Takeda rolled a kunai into his fingers, tightening his grip on it. Taking a breath, his aim was true as he threw it at the canister, the explosion killing two of the troopers instantly.

"What? We're under attack!" yelled out an engineer, activating her tech armor and rolling into cover. The LOKI attempted to react, but was met by an Overload from Fox and a Vindicator burst to the chest.

"One down!" Fox stated, slapping the side of his rifle as a burnt thermal clip dropped to the floor.

"Here, catch!" taunted Jack, lifting up the FENRIS and tossing it at an unfortunate trooper walking into the room. If he wasn't dead, he was out cold.

Takeda reached into his pocket and threw out an orange cylinder, darting back into the shadows

The lone engineer rolled out of cover and opened fire on Fox, who clutched his head for protection. Cassie leaped out from behind her safety block and double-tapped the other LOKI standing, combat rolling underneath it's arm as it fell to the floor.

Cassie tipped her Katana upwards slightly, unleashing Carnage at the engineer, who staggered back as her tech armor disintegrated. She stood over Takeda's canister, barely able to react before it broke into an orange light. Takeda stepped out of the darkness, the canister returning to him as the engineer slowly split in half, leaving a mess on the floor.

Jack grimaced, disgusted by the sight. "Bitch didn't even know what hit her." she mocked.

"Pulse blades. Of my own design." Takeda beamed. "Don't ask how it can just come back to me like that, trade secret."

Cassie noticed the comms terminal next to her, curiously walking over to it, pistol drawn. "Where is everyone!?" shouted Nasanna from over the radio. "Will somebody give me a report!?"

Cassie grinned devilishly, leaning over to speak into the terminal. "I'm afraid your mercs won't be able to respond, Nasanna."

"DAMN IT." Following Nassana's hiss, the comm terminal shut down.

Cassie ushered the group up some ramps and past a few corners. They reached the rooftop, the mild air causing a brief uncomfortable transition in warmth, but it was a passing problem. The group made their way past a pile of explosives, reaching a balcony overlooking the bridge.

"C'mon people... almost there." sighed Fox, growing tired by this point.

Oddly enough, the bridge was clear. Sure, there was some boxes for cover, but that was the end of it. Well, besides the trail of bodies left there. All gunned down, and by the placements they must've been caught completely off guard.

"Okay, what the fuck? What's with the dead guys?" asked Jack, dropping down to cross the bridge.

"Thane, man. Guy's good." responded Takeda, joining her at the front. "Let's hurry, if this is what it's like now then we're running out of them."

Then they ran to the other side. Like, FUCKING RAN.

Cassie led the team into Nassana's penthouse, which was more or less a glorified office with a view of Illium on the outside. She had three guards watching over her, who drew their guns on the unarmed quad stack. Nasanna turned her head dramatically, almost gasping.

"Cage... B-but you're dead!" she stammered, turning around fully now.

"You're horribly misinformed." responded the commander.

"And now you're here to kill me..."

"Overrated."

Nassana slammed her hands on her desk. "I had to kill my own sister because you didn't have the guts to, and now here you are." she complained.

"Well given all the shit I had to go through to get him, I'm toying with the idea of just killing you."

"Of course you would. You've killed my security, destroyed most of my tower and you're in MY penthouse."

Cassie calmly stepped forward. "Just looking for someone."

"Bullshit. It's credits you want right? Name your price."

"All the money in the world won't make this problem go away..."

Jack, Fox and Takeda felt kinda useless here, just staying in the background.

"Who gave you the right to play god?" accused the asari.

"Fu-" Cassie was stopped by a thud from the riight. The guards began frantically waving their rifles around.

"I heard something..." said one of the guards, still aiming at nothing.

Nasanna hissed in frustration. "Damn it, check the other entrances!" she ordered, but the guards didn't have a chance to do anything.

Thane dropped down without a noise, taking notice of the guards and his target instantly, acknowledging Cage as another figure in the distance. He swooped behind one of the guards and broke their neck instantly, turning towards the second and punching them square in the throat, causing them to collapse to the floor.

Nassana gripped his pistol and lazily turned around "...Who?"

The third guard, a commando didn't fare much better. Thane swept in and shot her straight in the head, her barrier doing nothing to protect her. Before Nassana could react, Thane sidestepped her extended arm and pinned his Phalanx into her gut. The two shared a glance before the drell fired into Nassana's body. He held onto her as she took her final breaths, laying her down on his desk. He grasped her arms and crossed them on her chest. He clasped his hands, taking a moment for himself.

"Damn fine work there." complimented Fox, being ignored by Thane.

Cassie tentatively approached the assassin, stopping as a safety measure. "Hey... I was wondering if we could talk?" she asked, cautiously.

"I apologize, but prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken." Thane didn't even look up, still in prayer.

"Does she really deserve it though?"

"Not for her." the drell looked up. "For me." He put his Phalanx back in his pocket, heading over to meet the commander head-on. "The measure of an individual and be difficult to discern by actions alone, take you for instance. All this destruction... chaos."

"Not like we had much of a choice..." whispered Takeda to Fox.

"I was curious to see how far you would go to find me. Well... here I am." Thane's body language oozed confidence. He knew he was good at his job, damn good.

"You're right, I did want to see you." Cassie walked up to Thane and stood by his side. "You're familiar with the Collectors?"

"By reputation, yes."

"They're abducting entire human colonies. The abductions on Horizon and Freedom's Progress were their handiwork and we're going to kick their assess."

Thane's head darted to face her. "Attacking the Collectors would require going through the Omega-4 Relay-"

"And no ship has ever returned and we're going to change that." finished Cassie.

Thane put his hands behind his back, staring off into the Illium sunrise. "You'd like me to protect humans I've never met, from a group that most of the galaxy knows nothing about, going to a place nobody has ever returned from?"

"Pretty much, yes."

Thane closed his eyes and took a deep, relaxed breath. "Yes, a suicide mission will do nicely." He turned his head slightly to his new employer. "I'm dying."

"I'm sorry..." started Cassie solemnly, taking in the new information. "There has to be something we can do."

"Giving me this opportunity is enough." replied Thane quickly, content with the state of things. "The universe is a dark place... I'm trying to make it brighter before I die. Many innocents died today because I wasn't fast enough and they suffered. I must atone for that." he turned to face the commander fully.

"I'll work for you, commander." stretching his arm out for a handshake, which was accepted warmly. "No charge."


	5. Yet another filler chapter.

_Wolf stood in front of the cascade of water. Looking over to his partner and grinning. He was a dirty flirt, but Fox didn't care. Every instinct in his body wanted the other's._

_"Joining in, McCloud?"_

_Fox could only watch on in a trance as Wolf yanked down his pants, making sure to bend over in just the perfect way._

_And damn it, he was wearing that fucking jockstrap again._

_O'Donnell put his hand on his hip, causing it to sway back and forth, taunting Fox. In his mind, Fox felt this happening for an eternity and he loved every minute of it._

_He wouldn't have done this if he thought Wolf was the scum he used to think he was, his moral code would've forbid him. But in the months and the war since getting a chance to really know him he was enthralled. The shameless goofiness at times, the fact that he seemed to care and damn it... that ass..._

Fox let out a series of gasps and huffs before coming back to his senses. He mentally scolded himself for giving into his urges. The lust was quickly replaced by frustration on how that it could've been better or lasted just that bit longer or even how it would've been perfect if it was more than just a passing memory. Fox quickly cleaned up

He quickly got up and got dressed in his usual attire, only swapping out the white jacket for a light pink one, further reinforcing the fact that most of these people's wardrobes consist only of palette swaps of their usual ones.

He turned to leave, only for the commander to walk in. Fox rested on the back of the sofa to the right, crossing his legs.

"Commander, need me for anything?" he asked.

"Just wanted to talk to you for a bit."

Fox shrugged his shoulders. "You've probably gone over my career record-"

"Dropped out of flight academy at eighteen, reformed your dad's old outfit, ended a war, liberated a planet full of dinosaurs at twenty and ended another war at twenty-one." Cage finished his sentence for Fox.

"Jeez..."

"I've told you before, Fox. This shit you've done is nuts."

"What about you? Gotta have some stories."

The commander leaned against the wall, similar to Fox and the couch. "Me? Well, beat up a former god at eighteen and got the N7 promotion a month later. Week after that I got the Spectre promotion. Stopped the geth bullshit, got spaced, ended up here."

"I'm guessing an ordinary life's out of the window for us?"

"Went out a long time ago."

Fox shrugged again, wandering over to a desk to the left. Cassie followed him over, taking a keen interest in the model ships he had scattered around.

"You're a ship buff?"

Fox turned to her, face beaming. "Yeah! Been collecting since I was six. Family was always in aviation so it kinda rubbed off me."

"You've got the old Normandy, too." Cassie picked up the model of her old ship, tilting it to inspect the underbelly.

"That one set me back a ton. Had a friend say that it had a self-destruct module in place so I spent the next two hours building it right in front of him."

That got a laugh out of the commander, so he must've been doing something right. "Ah, shit... I shouldn't be laughing about this." Cassie admitted, trying to stomp out her laughter. "So. You signed on to this job pretty quickly. No bribery or underhanded stuff needed."

"Like I said, I don't have much going on." Fox responded coldly.

"You've got to have SOMETHING to fight for?"

Fox sighed and pushed himself away from the desk, wandering over to the window to look out into space. The commander quickly joined him, having gone through this same song and dance with pretty much everyone at this point.

"Yeah... I do." He started. "There's this.. guy I used to go out with. Wolf's his name. During the first war we were at each other's throats since we were on different sides but... we met up. And we hit it off, soon after that we were dating."

"Well that's good, right?"

"But I always had that feeling that he didn't see anything in me as a person... just a guy he could always call around to fuck. And... I got worried that I felt the same that way. So we called it off for now."

"Well... maybe he doesn't? This your first time in a relationship." Fox nodded in silence. "So maybe you're overthinking it. You're still on good terms?" Another nod. "Then call him one of these days and talk it out."

"Might do that, commander. But it's not like things'll get better on my end." Fox leaned forwards and rested an arm on the window. "Long story short, I can't go home. Corneria's got a strict 'screw same-sex relationships' policy. They don't care who you are, if you're into that then you're walking into prison or your death."

"Jesus, Fox... That's fucken' medieval." Cassie put a hand on Fox's shoulder in a vain attempt to comfort him. "If you ever want to talk about it, I'm always here. We're a team. It's what we do."

"I appreciate it, commander." Fox responded. "Welp, I'll try not to take up too much of your time, probably got more important stuff to do, anyways."

Before Cassie could properly see herself out, the door to the room swooshed open and Miranda burst in, twiddling her thumbs. "Commander, we need to talk. It's urgent." said the Australian.

* * *

 

Miranda led Cassie into her office. Her bed in the back wasn't made but it's open side was being protected by a stuffed krogan, a goofy smile running across his face as his big beady eyes warmly welcomed Cage.

"Cage, I find myself in the unpleasant position of asking for your help." Said Miranda weakly as she sat down in her office chair. "I don't like discussing personal matters, but this is important."

"Alright, give it to me."

"You remember what I told you about my father? Building a dynasty?"

"Yeah, he created you to be perfect n'everything."

Miranda blinked twice before shaking her head. "Whatever... But there's another reason why I went to Cerberus for protection." She sat back up, making one wonder why she sat down in the first place. "I have a sister. A twin. He's been hunting her, but Cerberus has kept her safe... Until now... She's been living a normal life on Illium away from my father."

"Only not anymore."

"Exactly. My sources indicate that he knows she's on Illium."

"And by sources, you mean Sombra?"

Miranda blinked again, before sighing in frustration. "Yes, her." she went over to her desk and leaned forward on it, causing one of the most awkward camera cuts in any game I've ever played. ESPECIALLY for a gay guy. "He's too close. I need to locate my sister's family before its too late."

"So, whataya need me to do?"

"My father's VERY persistent. I'd like to go to Illium when Cerberus is moving the family to make sure his agents don't get too close. The move's going ahead tomorrow so we don't have much time."

"Then it's a good thing we're already parked here. I'll give Garrus and Sombra the call tomorrow and we'll pick up the sniper and make sure your sis gets out of here safely."

"Excellent. My contact's name is Lanteia, she'll meet us at the lounge at the Nos Astra docking bay."

"And I'll pull some strings to make sure we're all there at the time."

Miranda said nothing and went back to her desk. Cassie stood there awkwardly before backing off.


End file.
